Pain in the butt.
I’ve always been the leading edge of the storm, no matter what place, no matter what time. The wind blows, the skies threaten, and then the clouds open up and dump. Seems I have that effect on people. Or places. Or situations. I’ve learned to live with the fact that I can’t keep my mouth shut – it’s a failure of honesty and character. I work toward balance, really I do ; but, I think where truth goes, so goes a modicum of chaos – most humans aren’t wired for brutal truth. Well, most Americans. We would rather cling to our rigid, self-fulfilling facades rather than know what it’s really like when someone views us.
Even the most enlightened creatures have a veil between themselves and the truth. My version of events is only that – my version – and it isn’t the truth, either. I think given enough “truths” we may actually find some picture that is close to reality. Hubris haunts our every action. Cloaks our every decision. A thoughtful woman may falter at the the thought that nothing is true. I do. I marvel at the fact that I can only experience the world through my own senses and I can approximate no where near the truth. Hubris is in the forgetting.
Honesty is in the silence. And memory of fallibility.
Sometimes there are quiet storms. They never find their way to my shores, though. I am accustomed to ripping off Band-Aids and silence. Sometimes, it is just tiring. Sometimes, there is fire. Today there are only more clouds. As someone of good heart once said, “can we never catch a break?”
Another week of work awaits, it’s amazing what you get paid to do and what your real Work becomes. In one, there usually lies the other. Time to grab some more adhesive and yank.
I love it. I love you. I think my favorite saying goes something like, the more I know, the more I know I don’t know much at all. God, I’m not very eloquent. I found some quotes along those lines… “it is what we think we know that keeps us from learning” There is little truth out there and only one inside. One learns through the heart, not the intellect or the eyes.